Pairing up with someone for a lifetime is very important. If you are not getting the respect that you deserve from your prospective partner, you might as well call it a day. Here are some things never to waver about.
1. You believe people should be treated in a certain way
You have fundamental beliefs about the way you and others should be treated. Never compromise when you see abuse.
Let’s say he mistreats a waiter but acts like a “perfect gentleman” toward you. Will he be that way in a year or two when he gets comfortable around you? You may become his next target.
2. Your desire to make a difference
If he just doesn’t get why you have to spend so much time at work or help others out—red flags should go up. The deepest part of you wants to contribute to others, and if he can’t appreciate that, rethink your relationship. Don’t let him make you feel guilty for the things you care about.
3. Your friends and family (of course)
If whatever they do isn’t good enough for him or—as he tries to convince you— “for YOU,” disengage from him. A relationship should make your circle of loved ones larger, not smaller.
4. Lack of respect for himself
You notice that he has a set of rules that he lives by … everyone has these to some extent. But, he is constantly measuring whether he is falling short or whether he’s achieving an impossible standard. Pay attention: he may ultimately get around to judging you in the same way. You don’t want to live your life trying to jump through impossible hoops.